PostSecret

Not everyday, but more often than not; I wish I cud be far away, like the visitor I am so looking forward to seeing!

I miss being able to trust you, I miss being able to talk to you about more than just day-to-day happenings like gettting a new ring and skipping out on a visit to my in-laws. I miss being able to confide in you, I miss the way that I admired you, I miss thinking of you as my mentor. I miss the way that I could talk to you about how I'm feeling. I miss having you as a 'friend'.

It sucks to have to watch what I say around you, it sucks to have glimpses of the way it used to be and to realise what our relationship has disintegrated to. I always thought it was, as you said, the Grim's fault. I hated finding out it had nothing to do with anyone else, this is what WE chose to become.

I did learn a lot about you and from you in the last three weeks, I am just sorry that none of it was good. I remember how it used to be and can't believe that it took me 32 years to snap out of my coma and realise that it's been happening all my life. . . .

My friends were manipulated to tell all, then it was me being the stupid asshole that had a 7 year break to forget about it, then the kids and then me again. I miss not feeling like a fool and I miss who I thought you were.