I WANT TO GO HOME

It sux big time, but I can't help it, the fucking wound doesn't want to get better, so I can't go thill all the stitches are out. I've had them in since the 13th and am, to say the very least, FUCKING IRRITATED.

Also, been in contact with good ol' Grim. On Thursday night (till 4am) we were smsing to and fro. Yes I realise I'm not supposed to, and yes, it makes me sad and ever since, well, let's just say that I haven't quite been myself. I miss him.

Last nite, after my normal dose of pills and some tabs that I've never taken and will never take again, I had a 'bad' nite. That is when you get up, despite all you pills and you're off balance and waddle around like a zombie, your tongue slurrs as well. Unfortunately for me, mom was around to see it, so now we're not talking. It's not 'being caught', its her going around and telling everyone in the family before 9 this morning. When I told her I didn't appreciate her talking to everyone about me, she said she won't apologise, because she doesn't think she did anything wrong.

Ok, don't apologise, it won't change the fact that I feel betrayed. Oh, and of course, then it came down to: I'm a bad mother (again) and she is going to call my doctor. Well whoopy fucking doo, he is just going to tell her to piss off. And this won't be the first time.

So now I'm avoiding her in her own house. Lovely.

I want to go home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!